Jul 16, 2007 15:17
16 yrs ago
English term
Please help in rephrasing
English
Marketing
Computers: Software
description of a software product
I believe the word program is used too many times in the passage below. Or is it OK ?
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A software suite for sales, marketing, retail, and category management professionals comprising:
Program A - Presentation program with emphasis on visualization of marketing data, and
Program B - The program for processing and integration of third-party marketing data
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A software suite for sales, marketing, retail, and category management professionals comprising:
Program A - Presentation program with emphasis on visualization of marketing data, and
Program B - The program for processing and integration of third-party marketing data
Responses
4 +1 | use both software and program | RHELLER |
4 +6 | program | Phyllis Mitzman |
5 +1 | text improvement | Ildiko Santana |
Responses
+1
1 hr
Selected
use both software and program
this is one of my fields of specialization; I would write
Program A - Presentation software with AN emphasis on marketing data graphics (or displaying marketing data) and
Program B - Software to process and integrate third-party marketing data
what are category management professionals?
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Note added at 1 hr (2007-07-16 17:02:25 GMT)
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yes, you may write "visual representation of marketing data" just be careful how you phrase "with an emphasis on"- you may have to change that to "presentation software emphasizing the visual representation of marketing data"
Program A - Presentation software with AN emphasis on marketing data graphics (or displaying marketing data) and
Program B - Software to process and integrate third-party marketing data
what are category management professionals?
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 hr (2007-07-16 17:02:25 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
yes, you may write "visual representation of marketing data" just be careful how you phrase "with an emphasis on"- you may have to change that to "presentation software emphasizing the visual representation of marketing data"
Note from asker:
Hi, Rita ! Thank you for your help! According to my understanding "category management professionals" are the people who decide which and how much of each kind of goods of a specific category (such as soap, shampoo, etc. ) should be purchsed and offered for sale in a supermarket, etc. |
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category_management |
can I write "visual representation of marketing data" instead of " displaying marketing data" ? |
4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer.
Comment: "Many thanks to all! Note to ildiko - I 100% agree with you with the exeption that I am the author in this case. "
+6
5 mins
program
You can often use "application" or "software" in place of "program."
Peer comment(s):
agree |
Dave Calderhead
: Perhaps use software with Program A and application with Program B descriptions
5 mins
|
agree |
Marie Scarano
: good alternatives
14 mins
|
agree |
Jim Tucker (X)
: in fact, "program" is hardly used at all any more
22 mins
|
agree |
Mark Nathan
3 hrs
|
agree |
Elena Aleksandrova
3 hrs
|
agree |
Robert Fox
4 hrs
|
+1
26 mins
text improvement
I might be too "old-school" but I strongly believe that our job as translators is to provide translations of the source documents in our target language and not to improve the original wording. If the author of the original used the same term over and over, even if it feels sloppy to us, we are not to "fix" it; making a text read better is, in my opinion, just as wrong as making it read worse.
Peer comment(s):
agree |
npis
: I'd agree with ildiko. If you're translating, your job is to translate and be as consistent and as accurate as possible. You'd translate exactly what the original author had written. Unless of course, they'd asked you to edit their wordings.
18 hrs
|
Thank you.
|
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